Submitting apps to the App Store is filled with many wonderful opportunities to be rejected. Let’s count them!
1. Compiling/Building your app is the first possible level of rejection. It’s usually your fault, but some days…
2. Signing your app is also an adventure in rejection with the added joy of creating multitudes of profiles and app IDs than you really don’t know what to do with but are too afraid to delete.
3. Sometimes the phone itself will reject you next. Maybe Springboard is having a bad day, or maybe you really have made a mess of those profiles…
4. Hey look at me! The watch wants in on this game too! It likes to reject you for a variety of reasons but doesn’t like to tell you which. You’ll have to dig into the logs to find its secret motives.
5. Time to submit that puppy and get rejected by the iTunes Connect! iTunes is actually pretty good at this whole rejection thing and does its best at helping you through the difficult times.
6. Well now that you’re uploaded, surely the app… whoops. Nope. Time for the little Prerelease Binaries to reject you. Oh you didn’t know about that esoteric requirement? You read every guide, right? Right?
7. Time to submit for review and let the humans… nope, wrong again. Another computer can reject you now before a human ever sees it. Watch your inbox cause iTunes Connect has no idea what that computer is doing.
8-1,000. Finally after all that, you can be rejected by a human. This rejection process is long, filled with unspoken truths, false assumptions, and bitter quibbles. But at least it’s a human…
1,001-1,024. It was all worth it, your app is in the store and is running gr… oh, it crashes on iPad 2s when you rotate the screen during the 5th moon of the year.